Are you going through a divorce?  Do you have children?

Divorcing a narcissist . is . difficult!  This type of co-parent thrives on getting a response from you. First, try to keep your interactions with them very business-like.  Second, do not mirror their anger or bad mood.  Third, your Ex sees emotional responses (even negative ones) as signs that you still love them and that they can control you.

During your marriage, a business-like response usually resulted lots of questions. “Why don’t you love me anymore?”  Or, “What can I do to make you love me again?”  A narcissist will go back and forth between rages and charm.  Because they are confident they can lure you back in or get their way you cannot engage.

Tips for divorcing a narcissist and coparenting

Do not be afraid to say no, again, keep it business-like.  If they ask you to do something they could easily do on their own, like make a simple phone call, it’s okay to firmly say no.  You don’t have to explain yourself.  A narcissist wants you to explain so they can get mad at you or lure you into a fight (remember emotional reactions = love to them).  They will give you every excuse about how they are so busy with work or that they can’t figure out how to do it.  Do not engage, simply say no firmly and walk away.

Ironically, the last time we shared something about a narcissistic spouse I received an interesting call from one of our divorce clients.  He said that his soon-to-be Ex-Wife was angry because she knew that the only reason we shared the article was specifically to target her!  A narcissist will never stop believing that they are the victim.  Additionally, they will never stop trying to convince everyone around them that they are the victim.  The “poor me I need help” act that works so well on people that actually have real emotions and empathy.  Consequently, that’s probably how they lured you in the first place…

Divorcing a narcissist can lead to Parental Alienation

When divorcing a narcissist, your narcissist will likely try to alienate your children.  For help and support for parental alienation Click Here

Parent Education Class

If you want more parenting tips? Then we teach the mandatory divorcing parent education seminar at least 6 times each month at our office. Class dates can be found at Memphis Class Dates or Jackson Area Class Dates. Also, we go over mediation, apps for Tennessee coparenting, alimony in Tennessee, divorce documents, child custody and child support. Finally, we discuss parental alienation. More details can be found at www.TNcourts.gov